Love yourself and the rest will follow, fact! Talk to yourself like someone you love, eat like you love yourself and love yourself enough to set boundaries for yourself. It is pertinent that you love yourself or nobody else will. Trying to please everyone is a losing battle. Choosing to focus on self-love and self-compassion rather than trying to get others to love you helps to increase your self-esteem and break codependent patterns, allowing you to have healthier and happier relationships with yourself and others in the long run.
What does it mean to be in love with one’s self, to love yourself? And, more importantly, what does love yourself and the rest will follow mean?
Loving yourself can be one of the most difficult yet ultimately rewarding things you will ever do. However, many of us find it much easier to love others than to love ourselves for various reasons. We can be downright cruel to ourselves. The harsh inner critic, unhealthy relationships, toxic substances, and self-mutilation are some of the things some people subject themselves to; due to feelings of lack of self-worth, self-love and other self-perceived inadequacies.
It is, however, imperative that you begin caring for yourself and treating yourself with the same respect and compassion that you show others. Many people believe that loving yourself is selfish. This is not true; rather, it makes it easier for you to love others when you love yourself, for you cannot give what you do not have. How can you truly love other people when you do not love yourself? You cannot. So love yourself; it is imperative that you do. In addition to improving your relationship with yourself by loving yourself, it demonstrates to others how they should love and treat you.
The relationship you have with yourself is the most important and longest-lasting relationship you will ever have in your entire life. You are the only person with whom you will spend the rest of your life. As a result, you must enjoy your own company, have confidence in yourself and recognise your own positive characteristics. It is, therefore, worthwhile to put in the necessary time and effort to cultivate a more loving relationship with yourself.
Truly love yourself and the rest will follow. Things in your life will naturally fall into place when you love yourself. For when you love yourself, you say no when you need to, you set healthy boundaries with people. You would not take yourself for granted when you love yourself and you would do what makes you happy. For the way you treat yourself shows the world how you want other’s to treat you.
Below is a list of 22 suggestions on how to love yourself; that will help you in your self-love and development journey. Many of the suggestions on the list are pretty straightforward and self-explanatory. Whilst some are more difficult than others. However, note that you are not required to use all of these suggestions; do whichever ones resonate with you. You may also find that many of the suggestions overlap and complement one another.
Love Yourself in 22 Different Ways.
1. Make sure to take a break from time to time.
Are you on a whirlwind of activities? If yes, then It is time to take it easy and give your body and mind some much-needed rest. You do not need to complete every single task you have laid out for yourself. Instead, prioritize what is most important to you and let go of any guilt you may feel about saying no. Rest is a powerful rejuvenator and a fundamental form of self-care.
2. Make a list of your accomplishments.
Sometimes it may be hard to see just how much you accomplish daily. So make a list of all you accomplished as you work through the day. And at the end of the day, take a look at your list and appreciate just how productive you are.
Appreciate and love yourself and watch the rest follow or fall in place by trying this self-love activity. It is really effective, and it allows you to keep a record of your accomplishments, both big and small. You can also refer to this accomplishments list whenever you feel down and need a boost of positivity that will motivate you accomplish more and succeed in life.
For maximum benefit, keep adding to your list and reading it daily.
3. Take a stand for yourself.
Love yourself enough to set boundaries and the rest will follow, people will begin to treat you the way you want to be treated. Being assertive, like setting healthy boundaries, is a way of demonstrating to others that your opinions and needs are important. Loving yourself implies that you recognise your worth and can communicate it to others. It is also a great way to let people know exactly how you want to be treated. When you love yourself, it makes it easier for others to love you and treat you exactly how you deserve and want to be treated.
4. Learn to say “no” when the situation calls for it.
Love yourself enough to set healthy boundaries with people and the rest will follow. There is nothing wrong with saying “no” to people and situations with zero feelings of guilt because you deserve to do whatever it is you want for yourself. This is one way to set healthy boundaries for yourself. It is okay to put yourself first and do what is best for you. Saying “no” is a form of setting boundaries with people and at the same time respecting and loving yourself. So, if you are tired, for instance, it is okay to say “no” to doing additional favours, work and so on.
5. Surround yourself with people who are kind and considerate of you, and you will be happier.
Who you spend your time with has a direct impact on how you perceive yourself. People who believe they are deserving of recognition surround themselves with like-minded individuals. Sometimes loving yourself necessitates the termination of relationships with abusive or unkind individuals. So, surround yourself with people who genuinely love you and want the best for you, and you will, in turn, love and feel good about yourself.
Read more on healthy relationships, 8 keys to maintaining a happy relationship and tips on how to keep a healthy relationship. These will also be a great read to identify if you are in a happy or toxic relationship.
6. Work on forgiving yourself for the major mistakes in your life.
Sometimes we hold onto bigger regrets or transgressions than we would like to acknowledge. Self-forgiveness is a process of gradually accepting that you did the best you could under the circumstances. In other words, believe that you did the best you could with the cards life dealt you at the time. And as with all things, there is always room for improvement and growth; thus, you would do a better job today with the life lessons you have learned. For when you know better, you do much better. So, try not to judge yourself with the acquired knowledge you now possess.
7. Recognize and make use of your own personal strengths.
We all possess extraordinary abilities, natural gifts and talents we were born with, but many of them go unnoticed. Even more so, when you are busy and distracted, it becomes even more difficult to access these wonderful gifts you have been endowed with. Love yourself enough to focus on yourself and the rest will follow, the things you desire will fall into place for you. The ability to concentrate on your own personal strengths will increase your positive feelings toward yourself and motivate you to accomplish your goals and succeed in life.
8. Do not measure or compare yourself with others.
Other people are not better or worse than you, nor are they more or less than you; they are simply different. You are valuable in your own right, and accepting yourself eliminates the need to compare yourself to others. So, love yourself just the way you are, love yourself and rest will follow. Focus on you, within and lose the need to compare yourself with others.
9. Indulge yourself with a treat.
A treat is something special that you give to yourself solely for the enjoyment of it. Unlike a reward, it does not require any effort on the part of the recipient. Make yourself feel good by treating yourself to something special just because.
10. Get to know yourself.
If you do not even know who you are, it would be not easy to love yourself. Thus, invest time in discovering what you believe in, what you value, and what you enjoy. Consider the benefits of spending quality alone time to discover who you are and how you feel about the world around you.
11. Be completely truthful with yourself.
This one can be more difficult than it appears. Some of us are so adept at deception that we are not even aware that we are engaged in the practice. In all relationships, honesty is essential, and this is especially true in your relationship with yourself. There is no way you can love your entire messy self if you are lying, minimising, or making excuses for your behaviour. True self-love entails accepting responsibility and holding oneself accountable.
12. Take good care of your physical well-being.
The value of good health cannot be overstated. Give yourself the gift of feeling physically well by exercising regularly, eating healthfully, drinking plenty of water, sleeping 7-8 hours most nights or every night if you can, and abstaining from alcoholic beverages and other drugs. Eat like you love yourself. Truly love yourself and everything else will follow. For if you love yourself, you would watch you put into your mouth, you would take care of your body and exercise and as such healthier and happier. So show some love to yourself today.
13. Be fully present in the moment.
There are numerous distractions in our lives. Although many of these distractions are enjoyable and worthwhile, they can also be draining and prevent us from knowing and being ourselves fully and authentically.
14. Compose a love letter to yourself.
Composing a love letter to yourself will understandably be a difficult assignment for some people. However, if you follow through with it, it will force you to think about the qualities that you appreciate about yourself. So love yourself and watch the rest follow, appreciate yourself and all your amazing qualities by composing a love letter to yourself.
15. Release yourself from the responsibility of your mistakes and imperfections.
Do not be too hard on yourself. You are probably more harsh on yourself than anyone else is on you. So, give yourself some slack and accept your human nature. It is normal to make mistakes. Imperfections are a part of what defines you as a unique individual. Besides, no one is perfect, and we learn more from our losses and mistakes than we do from our wins.
16. Be kind to yourself in your own company.
Talk to yourself as if you were speaking to a friend or family member. Talk to yourself like someone you love. Truly love yourself and the rest will follow. Maintain your dignity and avoid tearing yourself down or criticising your actions. Words are powerful, and they can make or break you; So talk positively to and about yourself. Besides, the way you talk to yourself, sets the tone for how others talk to you. For the energy you put out into the world, even just to yourself is what you get back in return.
17. Recognise that everyone will not like you.
That is right, some people do not like you, and that is perfectly fine and acceptable. So save your energy on trying to please people who are impossible to please or who are not that important to you in the first place. And use that energy to appreciate, love and accept yourself. Truly love yourself and the rest will follow in the sense that you will attract people who will appreciate and love you for who you are. Loving yourself also involves being selective of the people you surround yourself with. As you should ensure they are people who uplift you and not people who constantly criticise you and tear you down.
Focus more on you, what you want and what makes you happy and less on other people, especially those who not make you feel good. The act of being yourself requires you to abandon your people-pleasing tendencies and embrace your authentic self.
18. Make having a good time a priority.
Every week, schedule something enjoyable for yourself. This is a great form of self-care and love. You mustn’t ignore or cancel because you have too much work to do or because your child requires assistance with his history report. We all require enjoyment to feel good, just as we do need rest. So do not skip on this critical requirement.
19. Develop an attitude of gratitude, love yourself and rest will follow.
Love yourself by practising gratitude towards yourself and others and the rest will follow, you will attract more things to be grateful for into your life. Gratitude is one of the most straightforward ways to keep your attention on the positive aspects of yourself and your life. When you wake up in the morning, try to think of three things you are grateful for. You could also keep a gratitude journal.
20. Be aware of your emotions.
Our emotions are an important part of who we are as people. So love yourself enough to be in touch with your own emotions and watch the rest fall into place. You would develop emotional maturity which will equip you to better face situations that come your way. Don’t be afraid to express your emotions, even if they are uncomfortable. If you refuse to acknowledge them, you deny a part of yourself. Make it a point to love yourself enough to express yourself in a healthy and respectful manner. Not forgetting to also talk to yourself like someone you love.
21. Engage in a recreational activity.
As you can see, we have a variety of interests that meet a variety of needs. Hobbies can be enjoyable, relaxing, challenging, creative, athletic, social, or educational. They can also be educational. Look for something that meets your requirements. So love yourself today, and engage in activities that make you happy and the rest will follow. Your life will be more enjoyable.
22. When you require assistance, ask for it.
Another important aspect of loving and taking care of yourself is recognising when you require help or assistance. So love yourself enough to set boundaries for yourself and ask for help or assistance when you need it. Needing help is not a sign of weakness; on the contrary, it takes great strength and courage to seek and ask for help when required. It is perfectly normal to ask for help when you need it. And just so you know, we all need help at some point or the other.
Which of these suggestions are you most interested in pursuing? I recommend that you begin with the activities that appear to be the most straightforward to you. To be successful when beginning a new endeavour, it is critical to set yourself up for success. For a week or two, engage in one or two self-love activities and then branch out into one of the more challenging ways to treat yourself. Over time, you can add new activities to your repertoire of self-care rituals. And, as you practise and incorporate them into your routine, they will become more natural and require less thought and effort on your part. So love yourself always and watch the rest follow. You will be a happier and better version of yourself.